The Krynoid Podcast
- Description:
- Jim & Martin get together to chew the fat over individual Doctor Who stories and invite you to do the same. In each podcast, a televised Doctor Who story will be discussed and the next one announced, giving you time to see it yourself and add your own views to the next podcast. Find us at https://krynoidpodcast.wordpress.com/ and on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/krynoidpodcast. Email us at krynoidpodcast@gmail.com and follow and tweet us @KrynoidPodcast on Twitter.
Homepage: https://krynoidpodcast.wordpress.com/
RSS Feed: http://krynoid.libsyn.com/rss
- Episodes:
- 367
- Average Episode Duration:
- 0:2:09:13
- Longest Episode Duration:
- 0:3:54:28
- Total Duration of all Episodes:
- 32 days, 22 hours, 23 minutes and 45 seconds
- Earliest Episode:
- 23 May 2010 (11:59am GMT)
- Latest Episode:
- 26 August 2024 (6:38pm GMT)
- Average Time Between Episodes:
- 14 days, 4 hours, 39 minutes and 40 seconds
The Krynoid Podcast Episodes
-
106: Terminus
Episode Duration: 0 days, 3 hours, 7 minutes and 18 seconds"What is this horrendous place?"
Well, Nyssa, it's Terminus - a place to which Bor was presumably drawn by nominative determinism.
It's a drab old hospital where the porters are metal, the doctors are Goths and the burglars are New Romantics.
The Doctor wins a fight, Nyssa loses her skirt and Tegan draws the short straw, what with Turlough staring at her posterior and the extras revealing her upper assets.
Did Olvir train at the Wayne Sleep Combat Academy?
Is the Doctor's creepy CCTV standard TARDIS issue?
Do the Vanir have enough dog poop bags to last until their next Ocado delivery?
And did Jim and Martin find Terminus to be a real tonic or some used Hydromel?
Find out here...
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106: Terminus
Episode Duration: 0 days, 3 hours, 7 minutes and 18 seconds"What is this horrendous place?"
Well, Nyssa, it's Terminus - a place to which Bor was presumably drawn by nominative determinism.
It's a drab old hospital where the porters are metal, the doctors are Goths and the burglars are New Romantics.
The Doctor wins a fight, Nyssa loses her skirt and Tegan draws the short straw, what with Turlough staring at her posterior and the extras revealing her upper assets.
Did Olvir train at the Wayne Sleep Combat Academy?
Is the Doctor's creepy CCTV standard TARDIS issue?
Do the Vanir have enough dog poop bags to last until their next Ocado delivery?
And did Jim and Martin find Terminus to be a real tonic or some used Hydromel?
Find out here...
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105: Day of the Daleks
Episode Duration: 0 days, 3 hours, 4 minutes and 58 seconds"No complications."
That infamous moment when the first Ogron on the left accidentally reveals his MENSA potential to his masters but no-one bats a shiny eyelid.
Yes, this is Day of the Daleks in which our intrepid TARDIS twosome wine, dine and enjoy a ride, while Yates pulls rank, Benton pulls out of a minor skirmish and the Brig pulls his hair out as he defends world peace from humans and aliens alike while, no doubt, also taking in washing and doing a paper round.
Will the Jeep Pronto ever make it to market?
Why do people keep giving the Controller dirty looks? Is it his personal hygiene? Or is it because the only kid he ever charges for his sweets is poverty-stricken Charlie Bucket?
And why are the Daleks wasting resources on their minions' make-up when their vital attack force wouldn't fill a football team?
Jim and Martin ponder these questions and try to decide whether this is a red-letter day or 24 hours of ennui.
Listen in for their verdict.
-
105: Day of the Daleks
Episode Duration: 0 days, 3 hours, 4 minutes and 58 seconds"No complications."
That infamous moment when the first Ogron on the left accidentally reveals his MENSA potential to his masters but no-one bats a shiny eyelid.
Yes, this is Day of the Daleks in which our intrepid TARDIS twosome wine, dine and enjoy a ride, while Yates pulls rank, Benton pulls out of a minor skirmish and the Brig pulls his hair out as he defends world peace from humans and aliens alike while, no doubt, also taking in washing and doing a paper round.
Will the Jeep Pronto ever make it to market?
Why do people keep giving the Controller dirty looks? Is it his personal hygiene? Or is it because the only kid he ever charges for his sweets is poverty-stricken Charlie Bucket?
And why are the Daleks wasting resources on their minions' make-up when their vital attack force wouldn't fill a football team?
Jim and Martin ponder these questions and try to decide whether this is a red-letter day or 24 hours of ennui.
Listen in for their verdict.
-
104: The Krotons
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 42 minutes and 24 seconds"The Doctor's almost as clever as I am."
Zoe Heriot may be the Krotons' pet but she must have been expelled from modesty school.
Yes, this is The Krotons, a saga of sub-standard scientists, snaky CCTV spies and shouty fridges from another world.
The Doctor flunks, Jamie fights and Zoe infuriates while the Gonds lack the gonads to take on their reclusive rulers.
Will Beta reveal the secret of transmat to his backward brethren (or is it still at Beta stage)?
From which Brummie enclave of Johannesburg do the Krotons hail?
Will the Doctor's twanged nipple ever recover?
And do Jim and Martin think the story is the work of High Brains or should it be dispersed?
Find out here.
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104: The Krotons
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 42 minutes and 24 seconds"The Doctor's almost as clever as I am."
Zoe Heriot may be the Krotons' pet but she must have been expelled from modesty school.
Yes, this is The Krotons, a saga of sub-standard scientists, snaky CCTV spies and shouty fridges from another world.
The Doctor flunks, Jamie fights and Zoe infuriates while the Gonds lack the gonads to take on their reclusive rulers.
Will Beta reveal the secret of transmat to his backward brethren (or is it still at Beta stage)?
From which Brummie enclave of Johannesburg do the Krotons hail?
Will the Doctor's twanged nipple ever recover?
And do Jim and Martin think the story is the work of High Brains or should it be dispersed?
Find out here.
-
103: The Talons of Weng-Chiang
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 55 minutes and 58 seconds"Never trust a man with dirty fingernails."
...Or a face like a Shar Pei's nether regions.
Especially if he exacerbates London's rodent problem, takes advantage of young scrubbers and test-drives prototype orgasmatrons.
Yes, this is The Talons of Weng-Chiang - a strange (Robert) Holmesian melodrama where people pop poison pills, ventriloquist dummies are hands-free and Birmingham has cornered the Chinese firearms market.
Leela takes some clothes, the Doctor takes a boat trip, Jago takes fright and Litefoot takes delivery of a surprise hamper, while Chang prestidigitates, Mr Sin recidivates and a mad old crone expectorates.
So do Jim and Martin think this is a superlative specimen of Seventies sci-fi or do they smell a rat?
Find out here.
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103: The Talons of Weng-Chiang
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 55 minutes and 58 seconds"Never trust a man with dirty fingernails."
...Or a face like a Shar Pei's nether regions.
Especially if he exacerbates London's rodent problem, takes advantage of young scrubbers and test-drives prototype orgasmatrons.
Yes, this is The Talons of Weng-Chiang - a strange (Robert) Holmesian melodrama where people pop poison pills, ventriloquist dummies are hands-free and Birmingham has cornered the Chinese firearms market.
Leela takes some clothes, the Doctor takes a boat trip, Jago takes fright and Litefoot takes delivery of a surprise hamper, while Chang prestidigitates, Mr Sin recidivates and a mad old crone expectorates.
So do Jim and Martin think this is a superlative specimen of Seventies sci-fi or do they smell a rat?
Find out here.
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102: The Savages
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 37 minutes and 49 seconds"I hate conducted tours."
Dodo single-handedly sows the seeds of the Doctor Who Experience's eventual demise, way back in 1966.
This month we find ourselves in a land where greedy leaders feather their own nests at the expense of the downtrodden underclass. And it's much the same in Doctor Who's The Savages, screened some 52 years ago (badum tish!)
The Doctor is drained, Steven is ordained and Dodo is reined-in on a world where the big city holds no attraction for our clan of outsiders, a bunch of sapped saps with their very own cheeky girl (but mercifully no Lembit Opik).
Who else gets to use the Doctor's vibrator? Did Jano and his mates manage to video The Daleks' Master Plan? Who's producing destructive vapours and shouldn't their diet be looked at?
And did Jim and Martin find The Savages to be a shot in the arm or an enervating experience?
Tune in to find out.
-
102: The Savages
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 37 minutes and 49 seconds"I hate conducted tours."
Dodo single-handedly sows the seeds of the Doctor Who Experience's eventual demise, way back in 1966.
This month we find ourselves in a land where greedy leaders feather their own nests at the expense of the downtrodden underclass. And it's much the same in Doctor Who's The Savages, screened some 52 years ago (badum tish!)
The Doctor is drained, Steven is ordained and Dodo is reined-in on a world where the big city holds no attraction for our clan of outsiders, a bunch of sapped saps with their very own cheeky girl (but mercifully no Lembit Opik).
Who else gets to use the Doctor's vibrator? Did Jano and his mates manage to video The Daleks' Master Plan? Who's producing destructive vapours and shouldn't their diet be looked at?
And did Jim and Martin find The Savages to be a shot in the arm or an enervating experience?
Tune in to find out.
-
101: Delta and the Bannermen
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 10 minutes and 30 seconds"Let's make this baby fly!"
Said the uncool and un-Welsh Welsh rock 'n' roller Billy, who refrains (perhaps disappointingly) from drop-kicking the Chimeron child over the Shangri-La camp's Olympic size swimming pool.
Yes, it's time to take a look at the distinctly odd Delta and the Bannermen, a tale of a baffling bee-keeper, unnecessary Americans, a shot-down stand-up and life-size plastic soldiers with lockjaw.
When will Ray realise that she's barking up the wrong tree? When will Billy realise he's sniffing around the wrong species? Will the Bannermen have a whip round to get Gavrok a barbecue? And can the Flying Pickets achieve further chart success now their leader has been reduced to smoking footwear?
Don't expect to find the answers here as Jim and Martin struggle to decide whether to mark the story hi-de-high or hi-de-low.
-
101: Delta and the Bannermen
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 10 minutes and 30 seconds"Let's make this baby fly!"
Said the uncool and un-Welsh Welsh rock 'n' roller Billy, who refrains (perhaps disappointingly) from drop-kicking the Chimeron child over the Shangri-La camp's Olympic size swimming pool.
Yes, it's time to take a look at the distinctly odd Delta and the Bannermen, a tale of a baffling bee-keeper, unnecessary Americans, a shot-down stand-up and life-size plastic soldiers with lockjaw.
When will Ray realise that she's barking up the wrong tree? When will Billy realise he's sniffing around the wrong species? Will the Bannermen have a whip round to get Gavrok a barbecue? And can the Flying Pickets achieve further chart success now their leader has been reduced to smoking footwear?
Don't expect to find the answers here as Jim and Martin struggle to decide whether to mark the story hi-de-high or hi-de-low.
-
100: The War Games
Episode Duration: 0 days, 3 hours, 32 minutes and 13 seconds"You have returned to us, Doctor. Your travels are over."
But thankfully not forever. It was, indeed, a long way from being all over.
So Jim and Martin stagger to their century milestone with their biggest story yet, The War Games.
It's an epic tale of trials, tribulations, heavily corrected (and impaired) vision, and a Very. Stupid. Voice.
The Doctor plays with fridge magnets, Jamie plays the fool, Zoe plays Villa like a violin and the War Lord plays with his real live toy soldiers - and gets a Paddington stare for his trouble.
Romans gawp and mince, wigs wander almost as far as the accents, and the scenery is chewed up, gargled and spat out - even when it's as wobbly as a Quark under enemy fire.
So do Jim and Martin think this is a worthy end for a very worthy Doctor? Or was it ten parts of terrible tedium?
Listen in to find out.
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100: The War Games
Episode Duration: 0 days, 3 hours, 32 minutes and 13 seconds"You have returned to us, Doctor. Your travels are over."
But thankfully not forever. It was, indeed, a long way from being all over.
So Jim and Martin stagger to their century milestone with their biggest story yet, The War Games.
It's an epic tale of trials, tribulations, heavily corrected (and impaired) vision, and a Very. Stupid. Voice.
The Doctor plays with fridge magnets, Jamie plays the fool, Zoe plays Villa like a violin and the War Lord plays with his real live toy soldiers - and gets a Paddington stare for his trouble.
Romans gawp and mince, wigs wander almost as far as the accents, and the scenery is chewed up, gargled and spat out - even when it's as wobbly as a Quark under enemy fire.
So do Jim and Martin think this is a worthy end for a very worthy Doctor? Or was it ten parts of terrible tedium?
Listen in to find out.
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099: Black Orchid
Episode Duration: 0 days, 1 hours, 51 minutes and 9 seconds"A delightfully unexpected afternoon."
Well it won't take up much of your afternoon and there's very little that's unexpected here.
For this is Black Orchid - a ripping yarn of bronchial brothers, lippy bookworms, smutty absentees and a child bride who's passed around like a gold ball at a Telosian rugby match.
The Doctor plays the clown, Tegan cuts a rug, Nyssa finds her double and Adric eats double his body weight in finger food.
But who is the tweed-trousered killer who's friends with an Amazonian Indian?
Could he possibly have any connection with Charles "not one of the Worcester Woosters" Cranleigh whose brother disappeared on an Amazonian expedition?
And who is the piratical prat with the badge for mathematical excellence?
Listen to find out...
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099: Black Orchid
Episode Duration: 0 days, 1 hours, 51 minutes and 9 seconds"A delightfully unexpected afternoon."
Well it won't take up much of your afternoon and there's very little that's unexpected here.
For this is Black Orchid - a ripping yarn of bronchial brothers, lippy bookworms, smutty absentees and a child bride who's passed around like a gold ball at a Telosian rugby match.
The Doctor plays the clown, Tegan cuts a rug, Nyssa finds her double and Adric eats double his body weight in finger food.
But who is the tweed-trousered killer who's friends with an Amazonian Indian?
Could he possibly have any connection with Charles "not one of the Worcester Woosters" Cranleigh whose brother disappeared on an Amazonian expedition?
And who is the piratical prat with the badge for mathematical excellence?
Listen to find out...
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098: Nightmare of Eden
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 24 minutes and 2 seconds"I don't work for anybody. I'm just having fun."
Not so much fun for the cold turkeys, the cattle-prodded Mandrels and the eviscerated punters on the good ship Empress though.
Yes, this is Nightmare of Eden and 'nightmare' could be seen as an apposite epithet by the crew and viewer alike. It's a heady cocktail of spiked drinks, unfortunate zips and insurance policy wordings.
K9 needs some obedience classes, the Doctor shrieks about his extremities and Romana gets a nasty love bite (but not as nasty as her dress), while Tryst accentuates the silliness, Fisk makes it uniformly worse and Rigg turns on, tunes in and drops out.
So did Jim and Martin find the story as first class as the toilet facilities or were they glad when the nightmare was over?
Find out here.
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098: Nightmare of Eden
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 24 minutes and 2 seconds"I don't work for anybody. I'm just having fun."
Not so much fun for the cold turkeys, the cattle-prodded Mandrels and the eviscerated punters on the good ship Empress though.
Yes, this is Nightmare of Eden and 'nightmare' could be seen as an apposite epithet by the crew and viewer alike. It's a heady cocktail of spiked drinks, unfortunate zips and insurance policy wordings.
K9 needs some obedience classes, the Doctor shrieks about his extremities and Romana gets a nasty love bite (but not as nasty as her dress), while Tryst accentuates the silliness, Fisk makes it uniformly worse and Rigg turns on, tunes in and drops out.
So did Jim and Martin find the story as first class as the toilet facilities or were they glad when the nightmare was over?
Find out here.
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097: Terror of the Autons
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 35 minutes and 43 seconds"I am usually referred to as the Master."
Or some very slight variation thereof.
Terror of the Autons is a story where a bloomin' cockernee is masquerading as an Italian, a Time Lord as an astral Mr Benn, Autons as an army of Frank Sidebottoms, and the man himself as BT's most sackable employee. Yet the Master can't muster the energy to think up an even vaguely misdirecting pseudonym.
Plenty of imagination elsewhere though with unfriendly neighbourhood Bobbies, dolls that are a bit too clingy, armchairs that give you a hug, a phone you can really get tied up on and gift daffs you really shouldn't look in the mouth.
Can the grumpy Doctor, scatty Jo, and a Maxi full of UNIT defeat the Master and the Nestene Unconvincingness?
And did Jim and Martin find all this plastic fantastic or as flat as Old Ma Farrel's CSO kitchen?
Find out here.
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097: Terror of the Autons
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 35 minutes and 43 seconds"I am usually referred to as the Master."
Or some very slight variation thereof.
Terror of the Autons is a story where a bloomin' cockernee is masquerading as an Italian, a Time Lord as an astral Mr Benn, Autons as an army of Frank Sidebottoms, and the man himself as BT's most sackable employee. Yet the Master can't muster the energy to think up an even vaguely misdirecting pseudonym.
Plenty of imagination elsewhere though with unfriendly neighbourhood Bobbies, dolls that are a bit too clingy, armchairs that give you a hug, a phone you can really get tied up on and gift daffs you really shouldn't look in the mouth.
Can the grumpy Doctor, scatty Jo, and a Maxi full of UNIT defeat the Master and the Nestene Unconvincingness?
And did Jim and Martin find all this plastic fantastic or as flat as Old Ma Farrel's CSO kitchen?
Find out here.
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096: The Time Meddler
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 6 minutes and 7 seconds"I'm not a mountain goat and I prefer walking to any day. And I hate climbing."
If you think Steven Moffat era Doctor Who taxes the mind, imagine being part of the 1965 audience and having to decode anagrams of the scripted lines on the fly.
And the mind is boggled in many other ways by The Time Meddler. How can an 11th Century monk have a wristwatch, electric stove and gramophone? Has the BBC lost the plot? Has Dennis Spooner been hot-spooning? Or perhaps the pee-drenched padre is to blame and thus a legitimate target of the (extremely) long arm of Doctor Tickle.
Our eponymous hero and visiting Vikings alike get merry on mead from Hur indoors, while Vicki suffers sexism from Steven, the new companion who likes to attack first and ask (too many) questions later. And then not believe any of the answers.
Will the groat ever drop for Steven? Will he find the bovine astronaut he seeks? What do you do if your TARDIS is smaller on the inside? Whose beard is camping out on Eldred's face?
And did Jim and Martin delight in this first ever pseudo-historical or do they disapprove of all this time meddling?
Find out here.
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096: The Time Meddler
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 6 minutes and 7 seconds"I'm not a mountain goat and I prefer walking to any day. And I hate climbing."
If you think Steven Moffat era Doctor Who taxes the mind, imagine being part of the 1965 audience and having to decode anagrams of the scripted lines on the fly.
And the mind is boggled in many other ways by The Time Meddler. How can an 11th Century monk have a wristwatch, electric stove and gramophone? Has the BBC lost the plot? Has Dennis Spooner been hot-spooning? Or perhaps the pee-drenched padre is to blame and thus a legitimate target of the (extremely) long arm of Doctor Tickle.
Our eponymous hero and visiting Vikings alike get merry on mead from Hur indoors, while Vicki suffers sexism from Steven, the new companion who likes to attack first and ask (too many) questions later. And then not believe any of the answers.
Will the groat ever drop for Steven? Will he find the bovine astronaut he seeks? What do you do if your TARDIS is smaller on the inside? Whose beard is camping out on Eldred's face?
And did Jim and Martin delight in this first ever pseudo-historical or do they disapprove of all this time meddling?
Find out here.
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095: The Stones of Blood
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 25 minutes and 51 seconds"It's getting rather exciting, isn't it?"
Well mileage may vary and opinions certainly differ a wee bit between your intrepid hosts on this one.
For it is The Stones of Blood, a tale of vampiric slabs, a reclusive mistress-villain with a morbid fear of lemon sherbets and the latest mismatched cop duo - Android and Wirrn.
The Doctor wears a barrister's wig, Romana sports a chav cap and Vivien Fay shows off her deep silver tan. Professor Rumford forgets her words and her bra but remembers her truncheon, and K9 spills his guts while being goosed by a jack plug.
The local druids summon a wrinkly comedy star, a camping couple suffer post-coital depression, and two clouds of bling argue the toss while the Doctor doesn't appear to give one.
So did the story stir the blood of Jim and Martin or leave them stony faced?
Listen to find out.
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095: The Stones of Blood
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 25 minutes and 51 seconds"It's getting rather exciting, isn't it?"
Well mileage may vary and opinions certainly differ a wee bit between your intrepid hosts on this one.
For it is The Stones of Blood, a tale of vampiric slabs, a reclusive mistress-villain with a morbid fear of lemon sherbets and the latest mismatched cop duo - Android and Wirrn.
The Doctor wears a barrister's wig, Romana sports a chav cap and Vivien Fay shows off her deep silver tan. Professor Rumford forgets her words (and her bra) but remembers her truncheon, and K9 spills his guts while being goosed by a jack plug.
The local druids summon a wrinkly comedy star, a camping couple suffer post-coital depression, and two clouds of bling argue the toss while the Doctor doesn't appear to give one.
So did the story stir the blood of Jim and Martin or leave them stony faced?
Listen to find out. NB: You'll notice that Jim gets a story title wrong - twice. Rest assured that he has been taken away and destroyed in a controlled explosion.
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094: The Twin Dilemma
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 35 minutes and 46 seconds"I am the Doctor... whether you like it or not."
Ahem... awkward!
Yes, this is Colin Baker's debut debacle as the Doctor, The Twin Dilemma.
A tale of a Hurndall understudy in a dress, two bratty bowl-cut brain-boxes, pestilent parrot people and a hairy slug with an inter-species libido.
And , at its centre, we have our 'hero' who tries to bluster, cower, whine and strangle his way into our hearts, and his poor sidekick, who has probably never felt quite so sidelined - or quite so kicked.
Blood bubbles, slugs slime, sartorial atrocities are committed with impunity and a thieving magpie is fed to the starving masses (tastes like chicken, apparently).
Loathe it or hate it, it's perennially at the bottom of the sort of polls its lead actor despises.
But do Jim and Martin think it lives down to its reputation?
Listen in to find out.
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094: The Twin Dilemma
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 35 minutes and 46 seconds"I am the Doctor... whether you like it or not."
Ahem... awkward!
Yes, this is Colin Baker's debut debacle as the Doctor, The Twin Dilemma.
A tale of a Hurndall understudy in a dress, two bratty bowl-cut brain-boxes, pestilent parrot people and a hairy slug with an inter-species libido.
And, at its centre, we have our 'hero' who tries to bluster, cower, whine and strangle his way into our hearts, and his poor sidekick, who has probably never felt quite so sidelined - or quite so kicked.
Blood bubbles, slugs slime, sartorial atrocities are committed with impunity and a thieving magpie is fed to the starving masses (tastes like chicken, apparently).
Loathe it or hate it, it's perennially at the bottom of the sort of polls its lead actor despises.
But do Jim and Martin think it lives down to its reputation?
Listen in to find out.
-
093: The Macra Terror
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 12 minutes and 15 seconds"No-one on the Colony believes in Macra! There is no such thing as Macra! Macra do not exist! There are no Macra!!"
Well maybe stop going on about them so much then?
He's right though. This colony is lovely - except for the brainwashing, harrowing jingles, cheerless cheerleading, occupational hazards and the ministrations of hit security group, Ola and the Bootboys, that is.
Oh and the Macra, of course. Not that there are any Macra. Or are there...?
Well, yes there are, as the name of the story implies, and they're a crabby (and shouty) bunch of crustaceans, with their grubby pincers on the reins of power within the colony. Meanwhile, Ben goes over to the dark side, Polly gets a haircut, Jamie has a fling and the Doctor has a problem with excess gas.
But did Jim and Martin give The Macra Terror 11 out of 10? Or did it just wash over their brains?
Find out here.
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093: The Macra Terror
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 12 minutes and 15 seconds"No-one on the Colony believes in Macra! There is no such thing as Macra! Macra do not exist! There are no Macra!!"
Well maybe stop going on about them so much then?
He's right though. This colony is lovely - except for the brainwashing, harrowing jingles, cheerless cheerleading, occupational hazards and the ministrations of hit security group, Ola and the Bootboys, that is.
Oh and the Macra, of course. Not that there are any Macra. Or are there...?
Well, yes there are, as the name of the story implies, and they're a crabby (and shouty) bunch of crustaceans, with their grubby pincers on the reins of power within the colony. Meanwhile, Ben goes over to the dark side, Polly gets a haircut, Jamie has a fling and the Doctor has a problem with excess gas.
But did Jim and Martin give The Macra Terror 11 out of 10? Or did it just wash over their brains?
Find out here.
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092: Inferno
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 56 minutes and 4 seconds"You're liable to wake up Old Nick going that deep!"
And imagine old Nick's horror when he woke up after the BBC stag do and found that someone had given him a comedy eye-patch and a joke shop scar.
But it's not just the Brig who's had an unsympathetic makeover in Inferno's alt-right universe. Cuddly Sergeant Benton is now brutal bastard Benton and lovely Liz has adopted a nasty wig and an equally nasty attitude. Professor Stahlman, of course, is equally gittish wherever you find him, but Greg Sutton's sexist tendencies have been crushed under the fascist jackboot - and he seems even less likely to achieve penetration with this particular Petra.
Throw in some technicians in wolf's clothing (and Christmas cracker teeth), a soldier shooting himself off a gasometer and lashings of automatic door porn, and we have something of a great big melting pot.
But do Jim and Martin think Inferno burns brightly or does it feel like the end of the world?
Find out here.
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092: Inferno
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 56 minutes and 4 seconds"You're liable to wake up Old Nick going that deep!"
And imagine old Nick's horror when he woke up after a BBC stag do and found that someone had given him a comedy eye-patch and a joke shop scar.
But it's not just the Brig who's had an unsympathetic makeover in Inferno's alt-right universe. Cuddly Sergeant Benton is now brutal bastard Benton and lovely Liz has adopted a nasty wig and an equally nasty attitude. Professor Stahlman, of course, is equally gittish wherever you find him, but Greg Sutton's sexist tendencies have been crushed under the fascist jackboot - and he seems even less likely to achieve penetration with this particular Petra.
Throw in some technicians in wolf's clothing (and Christmas cracker teeth), a soldier shooting himself off a gasometer and lashings of automatic door porn, and we have something of a great big melting pot.
But do Jim and Martin think Inferno burns brightly or does it feel like the end of the world?
Find out here.
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091: Castrovalva
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 34 minutes and 6 seconds"What are you concealing from me, boy?"
Not enough, some might say, for this is Castrovalva - where Master Waterhouse introduces the innocent and unsuspecting viewer to "Little Matthew"
.
But that's not the only harrowing element of the Fifth Doctor's first outing. The Time Lord himself is made incompetent (and incontinent?) by his regeneration but still gets to go on a self-propelling wheelchair and pulls off decent impressions of his former selves - and Basil Fawlty (the War Hotelier).
Tegan gets hot and bothered, Nyssa gets moist and, of course, Adric has a semi on, before they all meet
ChardonnayShardovan and his sheep-in-wolf's-clothing chums.There's a fly in the ointment, of course, and this one has a risible, raisable platform, a double-decker perspex top hat and a penchant for looking at boys on the dark web.
But does the new Doctor bowl Jim and Martin over? Or is he out first ball?
Find out here.
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091: Castrovalva
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 34 minutes and 6 seconds"What are you concealing from me, boy?"
Not enough, some might say, for this is Castrovalva - where Master Waterhouse introduces the innocent and unsuspecting viewer to "Little Matthew"
.
But that's not the only harrowing element of the Fifth Doctor's first outing. The Time Lord himself is made incompetent (and incontinent?) by his regeneration but still gets to go on a self-propelling wheelchair and pulls off decent impressions of his former selves - and Basil Fawlty (the War Hotelier).
Tegan gets hot and bothered, Nyssa gets moist and, of course, Adric has a semi on, before they all meet Chardonnay Shardovan and his sheep-in-wolf's-clothing chums.
There's a fly in the ointment, of course, and this one has a risible, raisable platform, a double-decker perspex top hat and a penchant for looking at boys on the dark web.
But does the new Doctor bowl Jim and Martin over? Or is he out first ball?
Find out here.
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090: Underworld
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 42 minutes and 5 seconds"Whatever blows can be sucked."
Not The Creature From The Pit this time but a story which could be said, in American vernacular, both to 'blow' and to 'suck'.
It's Underworld - a production so maligned that even most of the sets refused to participate. A CSO mother lode in which Minyans are led by Minions, the proletariat dine on the very rock they mine and gravity does precisely whatever the hell it likes.
Meanwhile, Gwyneth Paltrow gets a drastic makeover, Mr Dors takes it lying down and Leela takes a fancy to a bit-part with a Rohypnol ray. Chuck in some deaf-blind guards, hordes of bored extras and some rather louche lift music and it really does feel like we're descending to rock bottom.
So 'the quest is the quest' but will Jim and Martin see Underworld as a golden moment in Who mythology or will they end up feeling fleeced?
Listen in to find out.
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090: Underworld
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 42 minutes and 5 seconds"Whatever blows can be sucked."
Not The Creature From The Pit this time but a story which could be said, in American vernacular, both to 'blow' and to 'suck'.
It's Underworld - a production so maligned that even most of the sets refused to participate. A CSO mother lode in which Minyans are led by Minions, the proletariat dine on the very rock they mine and gravity does precisely whatever the hell it likes.
Meanwhile, Gwyneth Paltrow gets a drastic makeover, Mr Dors takes it lying down and Leela takes a fancy to a bit-part with a Rohypnol ray. Chuck in some deaf-blind guards, hordes of bored extras and some rather louche lift music and it really does feel like we're descending to rock bottom.
So 'the quest is the quest' but will Jim and Martin see Underworld as a golden moment in Who mythology or will they end up feeling fleeced?
Listen in to find out.
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089: The Edge of Destruction
Episode Duration: 0 days, 1 hours, 49 minutes and 4 seconds"If anything happens, let me know."
What do you get if you have two episodes to fill with no guest actors and no new sets?
Well in the weird world of Lime Grove 1964, you get The Edge of Destruction - a veritable cryptic crossword with clues from another, different cryptic crossword.
This is, of course, the one where Susan turns scissor sister, Ian seems to have been at the BBC brown ale, the Doctor - even with a head wound - still wins Gallifrey's Fastest Butler and poor old Babs has to hold it all together, despite her pathological fear of Salvador Dali.
Even the Fornicator can't help them as they try to discover what the heck is going on (and what the writer has been smoking) until, finally, the solution springs to mind.
So can Jim and Martin make sense of the sentient ship's clues or will the story leave them on the edge of nervous destruction?
Find out here.
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089: The Edge of Destruction
Episode Duration: 0 days, 1 hours, 49 minutes and 4 seconds"If anything happens, let me know."
What do you get if you have two episodes to fill with no guest actors and no new sets?
Well in the weird world of Lime Grove 1964, you get The Edge of Destruction - a veritable cryptic crossword with clues from another, different cryptic crossword.
This is, of course, the one where Susan turns sinister scissor sister, Ian seems to have been at the TARDIS brown ale, the Doctor - even with a head wound - still wins Gallifrey's Fastest Butler, and poor old Babs has to hold it all together, despite her pathological fear of Salvador Dali.
Even the Fornicator can't help them as they try to discover what the heck is going on (and what the writer has been smoking) until, finally, the solution springs to mind.
So can Jim and Martin make sense of the sentient ship's clues or will the story leave them on the edge of nervous destruction?
Find out here.
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088: Planet of the Daleks
Episode Duration: 0 days, 3 hours, 38 minutes and 39 seconds"It was terrible... and then I got rescued by this bowl."
No, not a symptom of BBC budget cuts - although its economically-priced, invisible owner may have been.
It's the Planet of the Daleks - or, more accurately, the planet of the plants which either spy or spray, the molten ice which somehow isn't just water and the locals who are definitely more than meets the eye.
Chuck into this great big ice-melting pot a poorly Time Lord, a lady with an embarrassing fungal infection, some flaxen-haired, squabbling space-squaddies and the most evil wheelie bins in the ninth system, and you have all the makings of an epic six-parter.
But does it deliver like Santa or disappoint like... erm... Satan...?
Listen in to find out.
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088: Planet of the Daleks
Episode Duration: 0 days, 3 hours, 38 minutes and 39 seconds"It was terrible... and then I got rescued by this bowl."
No, not a symptom of BBC budget cuts - although its economically-priced, invisible owner may have been.
It's the Planet of the Daleks - or, more accurately, the planet of the plants which either spy or spray, the molten ice which somehow isn't just water and the locals who are definitely more than meets the eye.
Chuck into this great big ice-melting pot a poorly Time Lord, a lady with an embarrassing fungal infection, some flaxen-haired, squabbling space-squaddies and the most evil wheelie bins in the ninth system, and you have all the makings of an epic six-parter.
But does it deliver like Santa or disappoint like... erm... Satan...?
Listen in to find out.
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087: The Crusade
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 9 minutes and 18 seconds"I'll turn the world we know into your enemy!"
Confusingly, this isn't The Enemy of the World but in fact The Crusade - a swords and Saracens saga of identity theft, cross-dressing and honey traps.
The Doctor is courting intrigue, Ian is caught in a sticky situation and Vicki is caught out cosplaying. Meanwhile Barbara and Princess Joanna are treated like sacks of flour and El Akir should surely be sacked for abusing his Emir's position - not to mention his long-suffering staff.
There's also room for the sage Saladin, the smitten Saphadin and the Unscrupulous Hulk, not to mention some stereotyped light-fingered locals.
So do Jim and Martin see The Crusade as a glorious victory or as successful as one of King Richard's hunting trips?
Find out here.
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087: The Crusade
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 9 minutes and 18 seconds"I'll turn the world we know into your enemy!"
Confusingly, this isn't The Enemy of the World but in fact The Crusade - a swords and Saracens saga of identity theft, cross-dressing and honey traps.
The Doctor is courting intrigue, Ian is caught in a sticky situation and Vicki is caught out cosplaying. Meanwhile Barbara and Princess Joanna are treated like sacks of flour and El Akir should surely be sacked for abusing his Emir's position - not to mention his long-suffering staff.
There's also room for the sage Saladin, the smitten Saphadin and the Unscrupulous Hulk, not to mention some stereotyped light-fingered locals.
So do Jim and Martin see The Crusade as a glorious victory or as successful as one of King Richard's hunting trips?
Find out here.
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086: The Creature From The Pit
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 35 minutes and 44 seconds"She tipped the ambassador into a pit and threw astrologers at him."
Public Notice: Beware of low-flying Russell Grants.
What else could this be but 1979's The Creature From The Pit?
It's a somewhat green-tinged tale about an enormous slug who, despite being chucked down a pit and starved, still seems very pleased to see us. He shares the dank depths with Catweazle's charlatan cousin but they're soon joined by a somewhat over-stretched stuntman, a sweaty Doctor, a haughty Romana and a tin dog in the middle of an identity crisis.
Bad enough you might think but they also have to contend with a matriarch with magpie tendencies, Poundshop Fagin and his cronies and a conniving old crone. The addition of the whip-cracking Captain Camp and his homicidal sprouts just makes things even worse.
But did Jim and Martin fall for the Pit and its attendant charms or were they left green about the gills? Listen here to find out.
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086: The Creature From The Pit
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 35 minutes and 44 seconds"She tipped the ambassador into a pit and threw astrologers at him."
Public Notice: Beware of low-flying Russell Grants.
What else could this be but 1979's The Creature From The Pit?
It's a somewhat green-tinged tale about an enormous slug who, despite being chucked down a pit and starved, still seems very pleased to see us. He shares the dank depths with Catweazle's charlatan cousin but they're soon joined by a somewhat over-stretched stuntman, a sweaty Doctor, a haughty Romana and a tin dog in the middle of an identity crisis.
Bad enough you might think but they also have to contend with a matriarch with magpie tendencies, Poundshop Fagin and his cronies and a conniving old crone. The addition of the whip-cracking Captain Camp and his homicidal sprouts just makes things even worse.
But did Jim and Martin fall for the Pit and its attendant charms or were they left green about the gills? Listen here to find out.
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085: The Web of Fear
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 57 minutes and 58 seconds"I shouldn't be down here at all, really. Driver, I am. See?"
Yes, perhaps it would be better if you were absent, Evans. You certainly drive everyone up the wall.
But the Welsh wimp is not the only peril in the London Underground in 1968's The Web of Fear. The slimmer-line Yeti now sling more web than Spidey, Professor Travers is now an old duffer cum Yeti whisperer, Harold Chorley is the obsequious and unacceptable face of the gutter press and somewhere a filthy traitor is at work...
Luckily, Colonel Lethbridge Stewart is at hand, with his ever-shrinking batallion, while Ann Travers proves adept at rebuffing both amorous advances and unwelcome interviews and, somehow, finds time to smile at a rampaging Yeti.
Meanwhile, the Doctor is delighted by one of his balls, Jamie hides in a bin and Victoria drops an unidentified lanyarded object.
So is the return of this once-lost story a cause for celebration or should it have been left in the cobwebs? Listen here to find out what Jim and Martin think.
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085: The Web of Fear
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 57 minutes and 58 seconds"I shouldn't be down here at all, really. Driver, I am. See?"
Yes, perhaps it would be better if you were absent, Evans. You certainly drive everyone up the wall.
But the Welsh wimp is not the only peril in the London Underground in 1968's The Web of Fear. The slimmer-line Yeti now sling more web than Spidey, Professor Travers is now an old duffer cum Yeti whisperer, Harold Chorley is the obsequious and unacceptable face of the gutter press and somewhere a filthy traitor is at work...
Luckily, Colonel Lethbridge-Stewart is at hand, with his ever-shrinking batallion, while Ann Travers proves adept at rebuffing both amorous advances and unwelcome interviews and, somehow, finds time to smile at a rampaging Yeti.
Meanwhile, the Doctor is delighted by one of his balls, Jamie hides in a bin and Victoria drops an unidentified lanyarded object.
So is the return of this once-lost story a cause for celebration or should it have been left in the cobwebs? Listen here to find out what Jim and Martin think.
-
085: The Web of Fear
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 57 minutes and 58 seconds"I shouldn't be down here at all, really. Driver, I am. See?"
Yes, perhaps it would be better if you were absent, Evans. You certainly drive everyone up the wall.
But the Welsh wimp is not the only peril in the London Underground in 1968's The Web of Fear. The slimmer-line Yeti now sling more web than Spidey, Professor Travers is now an old duffer cum Yeti whisperer, Harold Chorley is the obsequious and unacceptable face of the gutter press and somewhere a filthy traitor is at work...
Luckily, Colonel Lethbridge-Stewart is at hand, with his ever-shrinking batallion, while Ann Travers proves adept at rebuffing both amorous advances and unwelcome interviews and, somehow, finds time to smile at a rampaging Yeti.
Meanwhile, the Doctor is delighted by one of his balls, Jamie hides in a bin and Victoria drops an unidentified lanyarded object.
So is the return of this once-lost story a cause for celebration or should it have been left in the cobwebs? Listen here to find out what Jim and Martin think.
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084: Arc of Infinity
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 45 minutes and 34 seconds"Rondel - intergalactic region devoid of all stellar activity"
So how come it feels like we've gone on location to Rondel, rather than Amsterdam? There's certainly a lack of activity in Arc of Infinity - and a less than stellar cast, if it comes to that.
But at least we have a trigger-happy Nyssa, a new look (but, alas, same personality) Tegan and a Doctor who seems to be staining his whites with more than grass. And they're up against a naughty, helium-powered Time Lord, a swarfega-spewing 'mystery' renegade and something which appears to have crawled out of Colonel Sanders' bin.
Couple that with a pair of berks who give backpackers (and indeed bipeds) a bad name and a strangely familiar guard captain, who is the bottom of everybody's favourites list, and you have an uneven start to an anniversary season.
So do Jim and Martin see this story a delicious Edam or a Dutch oven? Listen here to find out.
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084: Arc of Infinity
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 45 minutes and 34 seconds"Rondel - intergalactic region devoid of all stellar activity"
So how come it feels like we've gone on location to Rondel, rather than Amsterdam? There's certainly a lack of activity in Arc of Infinity - and a less than stellar cast, if it comes to that.
But at least we have a trigger-happy Nyssa, a new look (but, alas, same personality) Tegan and a Doctor who seems to be staining his whites with more than grass. And they're up against a naughty, helium-powered Time Lord, a swarfega-spewing 'mystery' renegade and something which appears to have crawled out of Colonel Sanders' bin.
Couple that with a pair of berks who give backpackers (and indeed bipeds) a bad name and a strangely familiar guard captain, who is the bottom of everybody's favourites list, and you have an uneven start to an anniversary season.
So do Jim and Martin see this story a delicious Edam or a Dutch oven? Listen here to find out.
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084: Arc of Infinity
Episode Duration: 0 days, 2 hours, 45 minutes and 34 seconds"Rondel - intergalactic region devoid of all stellar activity"
So how come it feels like we've gone on location to Rondel, rather than Amsterdam? There's certainly a lack of activity in Arc of Infinity - and a less than stellar cast, if it comes to that.
But at least we have a trigger-happy Nyssa, a new look (but, alas, same personality) Tegan and a Doctor who seems to be staining his whites with more than grass. And they're up against a naughty, helium-powered Time Lord, a swarfega-spewing 'mystery' renegade and something which appears to have crawled out of Colonel Sanders' bin.
Couple that with a pair of berks who give backpackers (and indeed bipeds) a bad name and a strangely familiar guard captain, who is the bottom of everybody's favourites list, and you have an uneven start to an anniversary season.
So do Jim and Martin see this story a delicious Edam or a Dutch oven? Listen here to find out.
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083: Frontier in Space
Episode Duration: 0 days, 3 hours, 14 minutes and 6 seconds"Oh, how very embarrassing!"
That's what the unsuspecting viewer probably said in 1973 when the so-called "large and savage reptile" hoved into view at the top of the Ogron quarry. If only there'd been enough budget to show more than its dangly bits...
But close your eyes for those couple of seconds and Frontier in Space will reward you with many riches.
For where else can you find the third Doctor in hoisty judo slacks, Jo in platform baseball boots and Delgado's Master in a Dracula-collared PVC number with Dalek logo?
And where else could you observe, in one story, twitchy Earth folk, noble Draconians, monumentally thick Ogrons and a stir crazy TARDIS team, who are in and out of prison more often than Mr Mackay?
But does Frontier in Space go where no Drashig has gone before? Or does it outstay its welcome like a Draconian at a UKIP rally?
Listen here to find out what Jim and Martin made of it all.
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083: Frontier in Space
Episode Duration: 0 days, 3 hours, 14 minutes and 6 seconds"Oh, how very embarrassing!"
That's what the unsuspecting viewer probably said in 1973 when the so-called "large and savage reptile" hoved into view at the top of the Ogron quarry. If only there'd been enough budget to show more than its dangly bits...
But close your eyes for those couple of seconds and Frontier in Space will reward you with many riches.
For where else can you find the third Doctor in hoisty judo slacks, Jo in platform baseball boots and Delgado's Master in a Dracula-collared PVC number with Dalek logo?
And where else could you observe, in one story, twitchy Earth folk, noble Draconians, monumentally thick Ogrons and a stir crazy TARDIS team, who are in and out of prison more often than Mr Mackay?
But does Frontier in Space go where no Drashig has gone before? Or does it outstay its welcome like a Draconian at a UKIP rally?
Listen here to find out what Jim and Martin made of it all.